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Begin transmission:

The Plan for Anarchika


Anarhika is no longer just a theoretical nation! There is now a 3-phase PLAN!!! All we need now is a timetable.

Phase I: Funding and acclimatization

Obviously, Anarchika has to start off somewhere, and anything that starts off anywhere has to have money unless you're a plant. And Anarchika shall not being a nation of plants. So, in a clever, two-birds-with-one-bomb solution, we will first move to Alaska. The government won't suspect anything and it is totally legal to move to Alaska. What are the benefits of moving to Alaska? For one, it's really, really cold, just like Antarctica. For another, it simulates the special daylight conditions (eg, 24 hours of sunlight in the summer and 24 hours of darkness in the winter) as can be found in Antarctica. Therefore, Alaska will be a perfect testbed for initial colonization technologies. Now, here comes the second important portion of Phase I: the US government gives, I repeat, gives you money to live in Alaska! Thus, we can live a very cheap lifestyle, where income exceeds expenditures, and GAIN money just by simply LIVING in Alaska! Whoa, isn't that great? So we will use Alaska to develop our colonization technologies and to simulate Antarctican conditions while being paid by the US government just for taking up residence in Alaska.

Phase II: Go to Hawaii

Who doesn't want to go to Hawaii? OK, to tell the truth, I initially wrote 3-phase plan above, but I could only think of 2 phases. Besides, everybody could use a vacation.

Phase III: COLONIZE!!!

So now with our technologies complete, we will begin a mass exodus to Antarctica, where we will immediately deploy our colonization technologies, such as biodomes. After setting up our habitat, we will attempt to herd penguins to begin the process of domesticating the penguin into a household pet and food animal (See the first Anarchikan document). Once we have the initial habitat deployed and life has stabilized, we will develop technologies for the continued survival and prosperity of the Nation, which will probably involve cloning and giant orbiting satellite lasers at some point or other.

Phase IV: Disperse

Hey! I remembered the third phase! But now it's the fourth phase because of that Hawaii trip we had. At this point, we'll be pretty comfortable in our lives, so now we sever ties with each other and go our separate ways, organized into separate cities by similar opinions/beliefs. That is, get away from each other before we get on each others' nerves. There shall be a Code of Anarchika which all people must follow, and there will be a very loose administration for managing immigration and emmigration. Other than that, Anarchikans will live happily in their biodomes and won't try to force their ideas on others, thereby avoiding inflammation of tempers and civil wars, interacting in a civilized and friendly manner.

Addenda

Again, I would like to thank Andy Huang for his implications, even though he is a staunch supporter of the North Hole/Andyland/whateverthehellyoucallit. He says that colleges seem to like people from those far out places. Alaska is one of those far out places. Therefore, in Phase I, we can send all our people to ANY COLLEGE WE WANT, just because we live in Alaska. In fact, we would probably get financial aid, which would contribute to our coffers. So there are 3 very good reasons to start out in Alaska.

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